Heather=bad person. It seems all I can do no matter what I do is hurt people. Even when "its ok" I know it's not. Because it's not right, and somehow I continually put myself into situations where my only options are "hurt this person" or "hurt that one" and when it's all over even if I'm happy I still feel awful. Who am I to say who should be the one hurt and who shouldn't??? I shouldn't. It makes me feel like I should be the one feeling bad and I should be the one who ends up with nothing.

Stupid Heather, stupid bad choices, stupid existence. Why does happiness always seem to be tinged with such unhappiness? Or is that just me, at my most masochistic? ::sigh:: I want me to be happy, but I want everybody else to also. And it seems all I can do is make the "everbody else" quite the opposite of happy - whether it be temporary or not...it's still there, still because of me and stupidness. Much stupidness.

I guess I should stop not writing in sentences and think until I can make sense.

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